If I remember correctly, I was in kindergarten when the television series The “Dukes of Hazzard” claimed the top spot in the Nielsen ratings. It is entirely possible I’m wrong about the dates. Sometimes I remember things differently than other people. Or the even the truth. The other day I argued with someone about when she taught primary. I was pretty insistent I was right until I realized, uh, she probably knows her own timeline better than me. Oops.
humor
A tale of two Jord’ns
This may or may not have taken place. Okay, some of it did. Some of it did not but I thought it would enhance the story. I’ll let you decide what is fact and what is embellishment.
Difference
The birth of a catchphrase
I don’t cry over spilled milk. But I might cry over spilled detergent.
I went into the laundry room to put the sheets in the dryer. Distractions had prevented me from attending to the switch earlier and it was now later in the evening. The only thing I wanted to do was to put the sheets in the dryer and relax for the rest of the evening. Fate had other plans for me.
Why do I feel like a bus schedule will come in handy?
Oh heck no!
I don’t wanna go.
I can think of a million and one things I’d rather do
than go into that meeting with you.
I’m not superstitious…much
She looked at me with wide eyes and an air of expectancy. Normally, I would have agreed with her. In fact, I had waited for over 20 years for an opportunity such as this. But I couldn’t do it. I could not side with my sister-in-law.
“RH,” my sister-in-law, CC, reiterated in case I didn’t hear her the first time, “will not flip a calendar early.”
Yeah, so?
She wanted me to join forces with her in an effort to mock my brother. Of course she thought I would be an ally in her cause since I have led many efforts to mock my older brother ever since…well, forever. It’s a little sister’s prerogative and responsibility and I always take my job seriously. At least, this one. Otherwise an older brother’s ego gets too huge and becomes too unbearable to even associate with. It’s all in the Little Sister’s Handbook for Survival. I can send you a copy if you’d like.
Way to go, Steve Wariner!
I have a confession. Once upon a time, many years ago I went through a country phase. Don’t blame me, though, it was the early 90’s, the time of Garth Brooks – who personally brought a resurgence of country music. Plus, I happen to come from two people who prefer Willie Nelson to anything the Beatles had to offer. So, it’s in my genes and it was inevitable that I would catch it. My time with country music was brief. I stopped listening to it when I realized it made me feel older than my peers.
lms
There is a game
the young ‘uns will play
on Facebook
they’re playing right now – even today.
I don’t like it –
it’s an embryo of disaster –
validation
is the goal they’re after.
“lms tbh or ti,”
to be honest, the truth is I cringe at my wall
with so many “bored so I’ll rate”
being offered to one and all.
I know it’s tempting
but please don’t give in
and play silly Facebook games –
there’s a chance you won’t win.
You may be happy
with the end it’s true
but more likely
you’ll end up feeling quite blue.
Then those thoughts
will make you wonder why
and they’ll drive you crazy
until you break down and cry.
Do what you want
but if you choose to
you’re giving that person
control over you!
(and I say “Booooo!”)
Let me settle this now
and assure you you’re great
if I were to play
I’d say you’re totally first rate!
Is GI Joe a go or a no?
I went to see GI Joe: Retaliation last weekend. My main reason, at first, was to spend some quality family time with my visiting family members. I wasn’t opposed to going but it wasn’t a must-see. I know I’ve seen the first one but I can’t remember anything about it. If you want to see this movie, let me give you some homework. Watch the first one again. I was lost about ¾ of the movie. I totally forgot some key plot points. Like the fact there are ninjas in the movie. They are kind of a major plot point to remember. So, if the only thing you can remember about the first movie is the fact Channing Tatum (which I even forgot this key factor) is in it, you might want to re-watch it.
I could lie and say I went to see this movie because of its “honest portrayal of a war-torn country and the secret societies that uphold and contribute to corruptness.” But let’s be honest. What sold me is this poster my niece posted on her Facebook wall. You can call me shallow if you want. I prefer human.
On a side note, the actor formerly known but still referred to as The Rock has arms the same size as….well, as me. My whole body.
Okay, back on topic.
The movie’s plot moved along as if my three-year old grandnephew called the shots. “The GI Joe’s will save the day!” Since toys are always intermingled in one box the next figurine becomes the bad guy. “And they fight….Ninjas … on a cliff of a mountain…” I can imagine hearing little boys (or girls – because I was one of those girls) making fighting noises while conducting a battle down the hallway wall. And then dropping the villain figurines down the wall to signify them losing the battle.
There are some funny parts. The video game at the beginning made me laugh. And some unintentional funny scenes. The body bag flying down the zip-line in the background made me chuckle. I’m not sure if it was supposed to, though.
Want to see it? Planning on seeing it? Considering seeing it? Stop reading this post. Click on this instead and read a nice article about the television show Psych.
If you’re still reading I’m assuming you either already watched GI Joe or you have no desire whatsoever in seeing it.
There is one major “What the heck just happened?” moment. I didn’t believe it for most of the movie. I kept waiting for some kind of twist. Just something to make the major boo-boo all better. It never happened. I don’t want to give too much away. Let’s just say, that picture up top that sold me on the movie is false advertising. That scene did not happen. If it did happen, it occurred when I blinked.
I also feel like people in the London area may not like this movie so much. I wouldn’t if I lived there. They kind of get the shaft. Sure, the Joe’s save the day in the end. That is, for everyone except those who live in Western Europe. Sorry Europe. We’ll miss you.
In the end, the movie came together finally and held its own. Sure, I should have watched the first one. I think. Even after watching the sequel I really can’t remember anything from the first. If you like shoot-em ups and innocent people dying then this movie is for you. Or if you just want to spend some time together as a family… well, if your family is as cool as my family, then yeah, go see it.
ck's days 