A Human Common Err?

Do you think it is a human err to assume everyone is at the same level as you are? This is difficult to opine about without actually falling into the trap itself. So I will make it personal and see if anyone else struggles with this problem. I tend to assume that because I have reached a level of understanding everyone else already arrived. It’s as if I expect to be the last one to the party.

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Life Lessons from the Volleyball Court

I blame volleyball for the fact I’m still single. That’s right. It’s all volleyball’s fault I sit at a table for one.

Okay, okay, so the real reason is my lack of desire to play the game. Ever since it was on the rotation in grade school’s PE class, I have had a strong dislike of playing the game. “Please don’t hit the ball to me,” I’d think to myself in a prayer-like chant. That continued through Jr. High and High School’s PE rotation as well. I never developed an appreciation for the game. And since it is the go-to fall back in single wards, I’d avoid it. Hence, singledom. Just not my thing. So imagine my surprise when my youngest niece develops a liking toward it. Enough liking to be on the High School’s volleyball team. That is the only reason I’ve been watching the sport lately. As I sat at her game recently, I thought of how the sport can relate to life. Continue reading

My Quest for Personal Power. But in a good kinda way.

I recently read this blog post by my friend Stephanie.  Two days later, I was embroiled in a family conflict.  I could feel gray hairs popping out from my latest dye job from stress as I thought about Steph’s words.  But it was stress I brought on myself.

If I would have communicated better early on, I may not have gotten an upset stomach.  Nor would I have been tempted to play the blame game.  Or label a certain someone as a bossy brat (even if it is apropos).  And perhaps, I wouldn’t have been tempted to become a hermitess and disown certain extended family members  (I admit, I muttered, “who needs family?”).

There is a finesse to good communication skills.  A person, especially a woman, who takes charge, is quickly labeled with the negative connotation of being “bossy.”  I know I’ve done it.  Personally, I need to learn positive communication habits.  Or in other words, how to say what I want and then hear what I may not want to hear.  I believe poor communication habits have led to 90% of the stress in my life.  And maybe even my premature gray hair (just kidding, that was genetic).

Perhaps, perfect communication skills will be a key in obtaining the utopian society we all strive for.  Until then, in the words of John Mayer, I need to say what I need to say.  If I don’t, I can’t blame other people for my stress.