I’m No Ebert

I am not a movie reviewer.  I like what I like and sometimes there’s no rhyme or reason (lookin at you  Mummy 1 and 2).  In fact, I usually don’t like to disclose my favorite movie list because I’m pretty easily swayed.  What if I tell you one of my favorite movies and you tell me you hate it?  Then you proceed to tell me why you don’t like it.  It ruins my movie because now I see the same flaws.  Yep, I’m that easily influenced on some things.  So, I usually don’t like to discuss such things as movies, books, people in general, clothes, music, politics… You get the idea.

But I belong to Blockbuster.com and the darn queue keeps getting hungry.  Greedy little thing keeps sending me notices in my email begging for contributions.  I’d let it starve but I’m paying $9.53 a month to sustain it.  Why do I pay it?  Blockbuster automatically withdraws money from my account around the 9th of each month.  If I cancel any time before that, I basically lose money because I won’t get a refund for any unused portion.  So, the trick is, I need to cancel on the 8th so that I feel like I get my money’s worth.  I usually remember I want to cancel on the 10th.  Doesn’t make sense?  Don’t worry, it doesn’t have to make sense to you, only to me.  And it does, so everything is fine.

Back to the story, I have this Blockbuster membership and a very greedy queue.  Although, I don’t watch as many movies at home as I used to.  When I was younger, I could literally watch movies all day.  But I’m older and my attention span is now pea-sized.  Plus, I enjoy actually going to the movies.  Especially matinees.   If I get to go to the theater in the middle of a weekday, that means I’m not at work.  Yay for me! 

Lately, I’ve seen few movies and I thought I’d give just a quick overview of what I liked and didn’t like.  Keep in mind, some of the movies I had no intention of ever seeing.  I just have to keep the queue satisfied.

Eh:  I’ll start with today’s choice.  Bubba, T, and I went to see Chronicle at the theater (a matinee no less – thank you very much Presidents!)  I wanted to see this movie a couple of weeks ago but got out-voted.  More about that in a second.  As for the movie, I was disappointed.  Probably because my oldest niece, MM, warned me right before I left that “It was disturbing” (told you, easily influenced). I think she meant boring.  It was a long 90 minutes.  I’m still waiting for the plot to take off…

Eh:  Last night I watched Water for Elephants.  I had to concentrate very hard to type the name right.  For some reason, I want to call it Like Water for Elephants.  Not sure where that came from.  This was a queue filler.  I played solitaire for the first half of the movie.  Talked with MM for part of it.  Looked at Facebook for a portion.  And wondered why Robert Pattinson is considered cute (sorry Edward fans).  He kind of has an odd look about him.  Plus, I had to visit imdb.com to see how much older Reese Witherspoon is than him (10 years if you’re wondering).  And while on that site, I had to see the actress’ name that played Barbara Jean on Reba (Melissa Peterman).  That stemmed from a previous discussion that resurfaced during the movie.  But the movie did have a happy ending.

Yay:  The weekend before Valentine’s Day my friend asked me if I wanted to see a movie.  I chose Chronicle.  But it was her turn to pick and she wanted to see The Vow.  I didn’t really want to go to a chick flick the weekend before V-Day (dumb holiday) with another chick.  But I acquiesced.  I’m glad I did.  I enjoyed the movie and the fact that it was based on a true story, made it even better.  Plus, Channing Tatum isn’t exactly hard to look at for two hours.  Even if I do keep calling him Tatum Channing.  The lesson I learned from this, the lower the expectation I have for a movie, the more I enjoy it.

Eh: Eat. Love. Pray.  Another queue filler.  I discovered within the first five minutes that I wasn’t going to like this movie.  I wrote one of my blogs while it was on.  Here’s my take of it: “Oh woest me, I’m unhappy.  I must break my commitment I made and go find myself in a land far, far away.” Boo!

Eh:  I don’t blame the movie since it was based on the boring section of the book.  But Harry Potter 7A was a snoozer!

Yay:  Harry Potter 7B, however, was based on the more exciting part of the book.  Although the movie takes some liberties from the text that I have to adjust to.  I don’t remember Harry hugging Voldemart and jumping off the ledge.  And my favorite part of the book (the WAR scene) was omitted.  No matter, it wrapped the series up nicely and, incidentally, was the last movie I watched with my mom.

Eh-Yay:  I saw the first movie.  I know I did.  But I can’t really tell you much about it.  When I went to see the second movie, I was kind of lost for the first half.  Eventually, I liked it, more or less.  Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows had a lively action sequence and an ending that had me wondering for a second, (SPOILER) “Did they seriously just finish off this series with the second movie?”  I only wondered for a second, though.

Eh:  The ending of Captain America ruined the whole movie for me.  I don’t care if the powers-that-be are making a movie and he’s needed in it.  Boo for an ending that isn’t an ending so that another movie can be made about the beginning of a different tale.

Yay:  I was iffy going into Thor.  It turned out to be one of my better choices.  I became acquainted with Chris Hemsworth’s fine, um, acting ability.  This was another movie I went into with low expectations.  The previews weren’t impressive.  Thor looked like he was the product of a drunken make-up artist.  But then I saw him in context and I have to agree with Jane, “It’s a good look.”  Sure, it has another set-up ending but I saw this first.  It wasn’t a predictable pattern yet so I can forgive this ending. 

Those are just some of the movies I’ve seen the last few months.  You probably don’t agree, but don’t tell me!  You’ll ruin my yay movies.

7 thoughts on “I’m No Ebert

  1. More an action joy-ride than an intelligent thriller, I felt “Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows” was twice as loud as the first movie, and about half as entertaining.

    If you’re a fan of Sir Doyle’s Holmes stories, do check out the BBC TV series “Sherlock”. More vibrant spin, and it’s set in the 21st century.

  2. I loved Thor – really loved it. Natalie Portman drooling over Chris Hemsworth was just awesome.

    “The Help” is good – not as good as the book, of course, but worth seeing.

  3. I’ll add the Help to my queue – it’s hungry again.
    I know the critics didn’t like Thor but I thought it was fun! For whatever reason, I liked it better than Captain America – go figure!

  4. Pingback: Captain Phillips | ck's days

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