Forever starts today
The sun is shining up above
it’s the perfect day to declare their love.
Dressed all in white
they are starting this journey right.
The Epic Conclusion: My quest for 30
This is the long awaited story of how I finally achieved my 30 likes on my ck’s days Facebook page. What? It is possible that somebody out there has been waiting for this. At any rate, the story starts in November when I became tired of seeing the little message on the top of my page every time I logged in.
It intrigued me. What insights would 30 likes unlock? It reminded me of Super Mario Brothers. Just because that’s the last video game I ever played. If I achieved my thirty likes would I save the princess? I never really got that far in the actual game. Oh, this game was so on like Donkey Kong… or, well, Super Mario Bros!
Let me just say, my dad worked for over 50 years as a salesman. I did not receive any of those genes. In fact, I hate selling anything – especially myself. My motto is, to each his own. But if I wanted to perk up my flat line of 12 likes, I had to step it up.
Up till the time I started on my quest, I labored under the delusion of being witty and writing quality posts. The little voice in my head had me convinced my audience was just small in number. That’s why I only received a few likes per status (or worse none. Obviously, I posted those at the wrong time of day though. Otherwise, who wouldn’t like my blog posts?!) I just knew I was an undiscovered genius.
I stayed at 12.
Every once in awhile, I’d get brave and advertise on my wall. By advertise, I mean beg. “Check out my Facebook page…”
I spiked to 15. Oooh, halfway there!
Then my friend deleted her Facebook account and I dropped to 14. Dang me! That was the wrong direction. What if I lost the other 14? Then I’d have to start all over. Nope, I could not let that happen.
I decided I had too much of a presence on Facebook. Instead of posting to my regular wall, I thought it would be more beneficial to post more to my fan page. And it’s kind of nice because I have a certain amount of anonymity with ck’s days. Sure, I have a picture on it but it’s a glam photo so nobody recognizes me. I save my personal wall for, well, more personal posts (as personal as one can get on a social media site anyway).
I also started my Friday memes. Sometimes I’d get a devil-may-care attitude and post them to my personal wall. Usually with the status that went, “Please like.” So, of course, people liked my status not my page.
I told you, I’m not a salesperson.
I became discouraged and decided to be content with 14. But that message about the perks of 30 likes continued to taunt me. I’d have fits of bravery and advertise (beg) on my personal wall. After a few months, I spiked to 20 likes. They were probably pity likes but surprisingly, I’m okay with that. The increase gave me the courage to do a full on blitz. Well, a full on ck blitz. I invited 10 friends to like my page. Three accepted. Through my tears I decided not to take it personal. No, I didn’t really cry – but I did wonder, “What the hey?”
I continued to post my memes on Friday and an occasional post on my personal wall. The closer I got to thirty likes the more I wanted to see what it would unlock. Then I would be happy.
The number increased to 28 and stopped. Seriously? Then 29. Oh, c’mon!
One final plea
Last Wednesday I received my 30th like (and not one like more). This means if anybody decides to unlike my page – I will know. And I will know who it is. And that person will receive no small amount of dirty looks from me.
As for the insights unlocked? I have no problem divulging the secret if that will prevent one person going through what I went through.
I now have access to how many friends my posts “reach.”
There are three kinds of reaches: organic, paid, and viral. It unlocked access to the insights – it didn’t explain them. Yeah, I had to Google it to figure it all out.
An organic reach is when someone who liked my page sees my post. Either on my wall or the ticker.
A viral reach is when someone sees the post because someone else liked or commented on it. It could be a friend of a friend.
I don’t worry about the paid reach because it doesn’t apply to me.
With this handy-dandy information, I can now tell 26 people see a particular post and 2 like it. That’s less than 10%. In the words of my friend JJ, “Well, poop.” That happiness was short-lived. The delusion of being an undiscovered genius is pretty much popped.
Way to go, Facebook.
Black cowboy hat
He was working in his shop that afternoon,
when she stopped by to tell him the news.
He gave her his best grin,
and asked her, “When?”
She looked at her feet then into his eyes
and told him, “Sometime in July.”
I Will Be Happy
Remember a few weeks ago when I complained about having the ugly number 9 as my stat? And how I begged for viewers just to get one more and make my stat end with a lovely 0? And remember I achieved that goal? (okay, I had to cheat be creative to do it but it was worth it and I still don’t regret it). And remember how I said I was happy then? Well, something has come up. I have another situation that is bugging me. Don’t worry, the stats are fine. True, 6 is no 0 but it’s no 9 either. I’m fine with my highest all-time view stat ending in 6. The trouble is with my Facebook page.
I started a ck’s days Facebook page just out of curiosity. I thought it would be fun. However, I’m horrible at networking. After all, I only have (gasp) one hundred friends on my regular page. I know, I know. I feel like the modern equivalent of a leper. But I like the small numbers. The purpose of Facebook for me is to actually keep up with old friends. And new friends. I don’t see how I could do that with 400+ friends that I don’t even remember. Or know. Or could care less what they are doing. It would lose all its viral faux-intimacy. For me anyway.
Anyway, I started a ck’s days Facebook page. Since I only had one hundred friends to begin with on my regular page I have a total of 12 likes for my page. Don’t laugh. I’m serious. And I’m okay with that. I really am.
Except for the fact there’s this notice on the page that tells me if I have 30 likes then I can gain access to insights regarding my page. Gain access? And what kind of insights are we talking about here? Are they cool insights? Will it tell me how many people view my page and if it’s worth it to keep? Or are the insights more personal, kind of like a Magic 8 Ball that will tell me how I can make $1,000,000 in the near future? I am so curious that I now want 30 likes just to see what it will unlock.
I have been posting all my updates as ck’s days and nothing. Not one extra like. I’m being a trooper and telling myself it doesn’t matter. But c’mon, in this day and age validation is in the like. I’m not begging though. Well, maybe I am a little bit. See, once I get my 30 likes then I will be happy. Then I will be satisfied. Then I won’t have to beg. For a while anyway. Because as Patricia tells Joe, “It’s always going to be something with you, isn’t it?” (Joe Versus the Volcano, 1990). Um, yep, pretty much.
Father’s Day
There is a man I know,
a common man he seems.
But all he does it shows
he has always loved me.
2 sides
Identity theft
“Hello, my old friend!”
I say, “It’s good to see you again.”
She looks with wide eyes
and her slack-jaw says surprise.
A Roze by Any Other Name
They were a group of girls. Young compared to me. The oldest had been in college for a mere two years, the rest were freshman age. They were discussing naming their future children and I was eavesdropping.
“I will not give my child a common name,” one declared. “I had to be Casey C. in every class because there was always another Casey.” The others nodded their heads knowingly.
Ready to run?
During my twenties, I lived in three different states (four if you count my mission) and almost twice as many cities. I bumped around from place to place. Perhaps looking for a place to call home. Or I just enjoy the thrill of newness. It’s an excuse to get out and explore and not settle for the same old routine. I think I was born with a nomad’s heart – never really attaching to anything.
I am getting that itch again. Maybe it’s time to move on? But I’m older and more hesitant now. I know if I leave, I won’t come back to Wyoming. So I need to make sure. And so I stay.
But today’s question is – where would you live if you could live anywhere in the world?
Here’s some mood music while you contemplate.
