It’s that time of year again when we spring forward an hour. That’s fancy talk for saying we lose one whole hour. Sixty minutes. Thirty six hundred seconds. Gone. But it’s okay because in November we fall back and gain an hour which makes everything alright. Correct? Nope. As far as I can tell, no one is happy with this whole setup.
There are theories of why it exists. The school children and the farmers are the two groups who get a lot of fingers pointed at them every fall and spring. The general consensus seems to be that it is an antiquated system that no longer serves a useful purpose. Unless you mean disrupting everyone’s sleep pattern and making an entire population rather cranky a useful purpose. Perhaps there is a third entry in the blame game. Let’s consider it as some diabolical plan to make the population miserable twice a year? Some fact checker should check on that please.
I don’t know about you but the fall back makes me depressed. Darkness at 5:00pm does that to me. If I wanted to give into dramatics, I could describe it like this: it feels like I’m suffocating and dying a dark and lonely death. Good thing I’m no longer into theatrics.
Spring forward is no picnic either because as you know, we LOSE an hour. Not just any hour either. No, no. We lose a more-precious-than-gold weekend hour that I suffered through 40 hours of work to get to. Why couldn’t we lose an hour on Monday? Or Tuesday? Or even Wednesday? Nothing good ever happens on the middle-child Wednesday. Let’s shorten the work week by an hour.
For at least a week we get two times. “Do you have the time?”
“Yes, it’s 7:00. But it’s actually 6:00.”
Every time-change there’s always that hopeful rumor that swirls around. You know, the one where people question why we do this to ourselves. And perhaps it’s time to end it. BUT WE NEVER DO! I think deep down we like to be miserable. It gives us an excuse to be cranky for a whole week at a time.
“Can I help you with that report?”
“I’d rather you jump off a cliff.”
Normally someone might be offended with this exchange. But during the time change week it’s shrugged off because that person is suffering from Daylight Time Suffering Syndrome (DTSS). So it’s okay. Either that or cranky-pants person gets knocked into next Tuesday because the helpful person is also suffering from DTSS. In that case, the slugger is excused because hey, he’s suffering from DTSS.
In any case, there’s a mass population of the worst kind of crankies this week. The tired crankies who are too tired to care about their actions. So beware!