I have it in my power

To completely wow you.

It’s not hyperbole

When it’s absolutely true.

With just paper and pen

I can scribe something

That will elevate your view

It will be life changing.

You will read it and weep

And will want to share.

To keep it to yourself

Just wouldn’t be fair.

Wiser than Oprah!

More clever than Seuss!

They pale in comparison

To what I can produce.

With a push of a button

My wit will become viral

Faster than “Lin-sanity”

My words will climb an upward spiral.

This could all happen

It’s pretty much all true.

An ol’ one-two from ck

You won’t know what hit you.

But it won’t happen today

An evil turn of simple fate.

You see, I’m not feeling well –

So all this will have to wait.