“How long will it take before this weed stops bouncing back up if I step on it every day?” was my unofficial experiment of the summer. The answer surprised me. But I also likened that weed to us. “How long will it take before we stop bouncing back after someone continually steps on us and knocks us down?”

Monday through Thursday, while at work, I typically take two walks a day. Instead of a smoke break, I take a walk break and walk down to the gas station at the corner then return. I have my route timed to take about 12 minutes so that my little breaks will fall under the paid break category. It’s become a needed respite during the day.

Since my walks need to fall within a certain time restraint, I follow the same path every single walk. I know I can make it to such and such place and back before the timer rings. Every break I follow the sidewalk down to the gas station then turn into the parking lot and return making a small loop.

The parking lot needs to be re-paved. It is turning a bit gravely. Weeds in the cracks can sprout pretty tall. One such weed had the misfortune of being right on my path. So, I stepped on it. It was, after all, just a weed.

It didn’t even notice and bounced right back up.

The next day, I saw it standing tall like I had never stepped on it. Which, for me, was an invitation to step on it again.

The next day it stood straight and tall again.

That’s how the experiment started.

Every day I stepped on it. Every day it stood straight and tall again.

Until autumn came with its cooler temperatures. The weed no longer bounced back up as straight but started to lean. Other weeds around still stood tall so I know my constant stepping on it was beginning to wear it out.

The lean became more of a slant. Until finally, it was more parallel than perpendicular to the ground. After the first little snow storm it broke. But even in winter, nearby weeds are still standing straight.

We may not notice the damage a traumatic experience causes us. It may look like we bounce back and we are not affected by constant barrages. Which might be true but also conditional on other factors. If just one of those factors change – like the cooler air of autumn for the weed – our strength may be depleted and we may no longer bounce back like we used to. In short, we may be “fine” until we aren’t. It could just be a very small annoyance that comes along while in our weakened condition that breaks us.

For me, the lesson here is to always be self-aware. Especially of those toxic habits or patterns that seem innocuous but are accumulating unseen damage. Time outs are no longer punishments but are needed health retreats. Use them wisely. Martyrs are only honored after they are gone so don’t fall into that category.

In short, take care of you.