I guess the world ain’t gonna stop…

I’m not a big fan of Mother’s Day.  It’s been my goal to avoid it for awhile now.  For many years I have taken a weekend trip to get away.  It’s the same philosophy I use on my birthdays.  If I’m not home, it can’t find me and doesn’t exist.  It never happens.

Now it’s even worse.  To borrow a biblical term, I’m here without root or branch to celebrate.  Oh, how I dread this day.  Or, I should say week.  That’s how long all the ads run to remind me I need to celebrate my mom.  Yes, thank you for the reminder.  That’s very diligent of you.

This year, through some kind of fluke, I made commitments that require me to stay home for the weekend.  Oh, dang me!  So, how should I spend the day?

I’m not going to lie; there is a part of me, a big part, that just wants to spend the day in bed.  Not in a self-pity, oh woest me sort of way.  But more in a just let the day pass and I could really use the rest anyway.  The thought sounds very appealing.

But then there’s that small nagging voice inside of me.  The voice that sounds remarkably like my father because this is what he told me, “You need to put your big girl pants on and deal with it.”  Okay, he didn’t put it in those words but that was the gist of it.  In other words, I can’t let the day beat me.  Mother’s Day will happen no matter what, no matter where I am.  Don’t let the day beat me.  Rise above it.  (sigh) It’s not as if I’m the only one in this situation.

As Reba sings, “I guess the world ain’t gonna stop, for my broken heart”  (Liz Hengber and Keith Palmer, “For My Broken Heart,” 1991).  But is it really wrong for me to stop – just for one day?  Anyone else sharing this dilemma?

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4 thoughts on “I guess the world ain’t gonna stop…

  1. My mother died over 10 years ago. Near the time of her death I found it a terrible slap in the face – a reminder that I had lost my beautiful mum, Mothers Day was not a welcome day. All the cards the weeks beforehand was the worst reminder, but also every television programme or radio station seemed to be talking about it, and they never talk about the ones who have no mother any more! 😦

    But Mothers Day goes passed me now, I barely notice it at all. In fact I wasn’t aware it was Mothers Day for everyone in the US today, because the UK Mothers Day was two months ago – 10th March!

    I suppose it’s different for everyone, how reminders effect them, and how long the worst of it lasts. I hope this day becomes a lot less painful for you very soon. 🙂

  2. Thank you for your kind comments. This is only the second M-Day without mom. Maybe next year I’ll be tougher?!
    Nah, that’s not my style. I kinda like having a day to wallow and lick my wounds. 🙂

  3. Mother’s Day has always been hard for me too but for different reasons. My mother suffered from untreated mental illness. From the time I was very small, many of my interactions with her were very fearful and stressful. Living with her was like a roller coaster. I never knew what it was going to be like from day to day. She went from being pleasant & fun to raging with anger to crying with heart breaking sadness at the drop of a dime. She died when I was 18. During the grief I had two feelings. One was guilt for all the negative feelings I had for her & the other was sadness for the security and safety that I never experienced in my relationship with her. Mother’s Day got better for me when I became a mother because I now I get to look forward to homemade gifts & cards from my kids.

  4. I have a friend whose mother (and her mother) also hated Mother’s Day because it made her feel inadequate. She was a very nice and respectable lady who I would not have ever thought such feelings occurred to her. But they did and so she would stay home from church on Mother’s Day.
    My grandma was nine when she lost her mother and that was the first year of recognizing Mother’s Day. They gave the children carnations to wear – white ones if the moms were still living and red ones if the mother had died. My grandma wanted a white one like the other children. She never was a big fan of Mother’s Day.
    Thanks for sharing your story! I’m glad it got better for you. ☺

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