Please sir, can I have some more?

Budget:   a plan specifying how resources, especially time or money, will be allocated or spent during a particular period (Encarta Dictionary).

I am not what you would call a good budgeter.  It’s not that I’m a bad budgeter – unless by bad you mean entirely not budgeting then, yes, I am pretty horrible.  The thing is I believe in budgets.  I believe in living within my means.  I believe in being resourceful and thrifty.  In theory.  When it comes to practice, well, let’s just leave it at that. 

Naturally, I have an excuse.  I didn’t say I have a reason – only an excuse.  And here’s my justification that really is more of a rationalization but that is okay because someday I’m sure it will be my vindication:  I hate math.  I try to figure out a budget but when I look at numbers all I see is ^&*()*^%$##.  And that makes no sense, right?

Since I know budgets are so important (and getting increasingly so) I have made certain rules.  I don’t spend more than $3 per lunch at work.  Why I decided $3 is my limit, I’m not sure.  But I’m proud as punch when I find deals for $2.50.  I feel just like an efficient budgeter. 

I’m not going to lie.  A $3.00 meal means making sacrifices.  Like sometimes I forgo taste. Usually, however, I lose out on satiating my hunger.  Those Lean Cuisines are always a bargain buy.  But I have discovered the reason is because I can eat a whole cuisine in three bites.   I have to refrain from licking the tray in an attempt to get just a little more. 

I have found the two pizzas in a box fit inside my pseudo-budget quite nicely.  One box can feed me for two lunches.  Sort of.  While I’m heating a pizza in the microwave my co-workers will comment how good it smells.  Then the buzzer goes off and they look at my little round disc.  That’s usually when I get asked, “Do you want some of my lunch?”

“No, thanks,” I say stoically.  “This is just right.”  But that’s a lie.  Today I spent almost five minutes scraping off the melted cheese from the cardboard. 

When I got home I was so hungry that I treated myself to McDonald’s.  And no, I did not order off the dollar menu.  

So much for my pseudo-budget.

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