Plan B: Chapter V

Chapter V: Plan C

Lizzie took a deep breath when she heard the back door open. Her talk with Matt had helped her immensely to calm down enough to think rationally. And then screaming at a train with him had drained her reserve. She was exhausted but restless. All she wanted was to climb into bed and make this day end but she knew it wasn’t over quite yet. She still needed to talk to her dad and he was just coming home.

Chuck walked in slowly and saw her sitting at the kitchen table. He nodded his head and sat down opposite her. Neither of them spoke and they could not make eye contact with each other.

“How’s Sharon?” she asked finally.

He forced a small smile. “Not great but she’s a strong woman.” He exhaled a deep breath. “She’s already buried one husband so she’s a little angry with God right now.”

Lizzie nodded. “I get that.”

He shrugged his shoulders but didn’t say anything.

What was it Matt asked her? What did her and her father talk about every week? Sports. Sports that she could not care less about. At the time, she thought she was being clever by discussing something her dad loved. She had convinced herself that the two of them were close because they talked so frequently. None of her friends could say the same. But so what? She had no idea what was going on in her dad’s life and he didn’t know about hers. So, this silence they were sitting in had to end.

“I was mugged in New York,” she said softly. She surprised herself with her choice of opener but didn’t know how else to start. The rest of what she needed to say she was able to rehearse. She just couldn’t think of a good opener. So, this was it.

He looked at her alarmed. “What?”

She looked at him. “I was mugged.”

“Are you all right? Were you hurt? Is that why you came home?” his questions were rapid fire.

She smiled. “Yes, I am fine. It happened a year after I moved there but I didn’t want to tell you because I knew you’d come to New York and try to be my bodyguard.”

He relaxed and smiled. “I would have if you would have let me.”

“Let you? Since when did I need to let you do things? You’ve always been my Papa Bear and you never waited for my permission on anything.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” his voice sounded like he was in deep thought. “You have always been my independent little cuss. You never let me step in and help.”

Her jaw dropped open. “What? What about the Winterball formal? My date was 30 minutes late and you disappeared.”

He squinted his eyes. “I believe I had to run to Home Depot.”

She slapped the table. “Ha! As soon as you returned my date showed up. Tell me you didn’t have anything to do with dragging him over here?”

He shrugged. “I don’t recall…”

“Dad,” she interrupted. “He was wearing jeans and one of your old ties.”

He shook his head.

“He told me you came and dragged him out of the arcade. I believe the word he used was threatened.”

“The rat fink,” he said. “I always knew I couldn’t trust the kid. Beady eyes.”

She waved her hand. “The point is, you and I have kept a lot of secrets from each other in order to protect each other.”

He thought about it and nodded his head. “Maybe so.”

“What we did was create this gulf between the two of us. We don’t know each other, not really.”

He exhaled.

She sat for a moment, unsure if she should go on. But she had rehearsed this speech the whole time she was waiting for him to come home. She was going to finish it. “I think,” she said slowly, “I think when mom died, we were both so hurt and in so much pain. We knew that the only other one that felt that much pain was each other. So, we didn’t want to be the cause of hurting each other more.” Her voice trailed off. “And we just stopped talking to each other.”

“We talked every week,” he said defensively.

“Did we though?” she bit her bottom lip. “I think we fell into this habit of telling each other about only the good stuff and we left out the bad stuff. That left out so much because we were never giving each other the whole picture.” She sighed, and figured she might as well keep going. “For example, the truth is, I’m not a sports fan. I only talked sports with you because you are a fan.”

His eyes grew wide. “Really? You faked it very well.”

Even though it wasn’t exactly a compliment because it meant she was a good liar, she took it as one. It showed off her research skills. “I did my research. Had a few contacts feeding me information. Used social media to find out some scores.”

“Did you ever attend a Yankees game while you were there?” he asked slowly.

“Yeah,” she said dragging the word out, “I worked as a ticket taker as one of my side jobs. Never watched a whole game though.”

His face fell.

“Are you disappointed?” she asked second guessing her plan. Maybe the whole truth thing should have started with that night and not been retroactive.

He looked at her for a moment and then smiled. “Nah,” he waved his hand at her. “Truth be told, I’m not that big of a sports fanatic. I mean, I’ll watch a game now and then but I also did my research just to talk to you. You seemed so excited about it all. I was just trying to keep up.”

They looked at each other and then both started laughing.

“Are you kidding me?” she asked. “We had weekly conversations discussing something neither one of us care that much about?”

They laughed and it felt good to laugh after the day they had so they laughed a little longer than they would have otherwise. Until she said, “Wait, this is actually really sad.”

“And pathetic,” he joined in but was still smiling.

They sat there for a moment while they processed the revelation they just gave each other.

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Lizzie said. “We need to stop protecting each other and just tell each other what is going on. No more hiding.”

“No more hiding,” he repeated.

“No more protecting each other,” she said and thought for a moment. “That sounds kind of weird.”

He shrugged. “Maybe, but no more protecting each other,” he repeated.

She nodded.

“Well,” he said, “it is getting late. Maybe we should head for bed and put this day behind us?”

“Okay, there’s just one more thing. I was actually mugged twice in New York.”

“What?” he asked.

“Just trying to catch you up.”

He tapped the kitchen table with his finger.

“How about you?” she asked. “Anything else you want to tell me about?”

“Well, let’s see, you know about the cancer thing, right?”

She looked at him and used her willpower to not roll her eyes. She’d allow him this levity at the moment. “Yeah, yeah, I heard about that,” she said. “Your doctor told me that much.”

He nodded. “So, I think that’s all I have for tonight. There might be more tomorrow though.” He looked at her. “You meeting with your agent tomorrow?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. It just seems like a bad time.”

He leaned closer to her. “Let me rephrase that, you are meeting with your agent tomorrow,” he stated.

She still hesitated to answer.

“You are not going to put your life on hold for me. You need to keep living and dreaming and making goals. That much I insist on.” His eyes looked like he was lost in some thought or memory. He focused on her again, “You will meet with your agent tomorrow.”

“Fine,” she relented. “It wouldn’t hurt to hear what he has to say. It will probably be some kind of rejection though. I don’t know why he has to seek me out to reject me. That seems a little cruel.”

“Meet with him and find out,” he said and stood up from the table. He kissed the top of her head. “I’m exhausted, I’m going to bed.”

She watched as he walked out of the kitchen and took a deep breath. This was not in her plan, but she was on a new plan now. Her original life plan, plan A dissipated when she left New York. She was still in the process of trying to embrace plan B here. And now today’s news diverted her to plan C. What exactly did that look like? Lizzie had no idea, but she did know she was going to need some sleep before she faced this new plan.