novel

Years ago, I wrote a book. It’s not all that great but it does have a beginning and an end. It’s about a girl named Grace who takes a challenge from a guy named Matt that she can go on 31 dates in 31 days. It is set in an LDS single’s ward.

A lot of the dialogue is taken from actual experiences in my life. Including the following discussion on altitude. Can you guess which character’s voice is mine? Unfortunately, it is not the heroine’s.

Here is a chapter from my book.

My body was still very much upset with me when I woke up Sunday morning. It complained as I was getting ready for church. It definitely let me know how unhappy it was with me when I sat on the bench in the chapel. The folding chair in Sunday School and Relief Society didn’t appease it any.

The good news during church was it was my fourth week since Matt and I started the game. It was old news. I hardly got any stares or comments. The news article from last week seemed all but forgotten. For the first time all month, I felt like a regular member.

My date for the night was Niles Scott, a tall skinny guy who turned red every time he spoke in his monotonous voice. We were going to another fireside at the bishop’s house.

When we arrived to the bishop’s house, people had already gathered. The living room was full of people. There were two empty spots on the love seat next to Lexi, but I kept looking. “Where do you want to sit?” I asked but as I turned around Niles was gone. “Okay, table for one,” I mumbled.

“Grace,” I heard my name called.

I scanned the room of people but couldn’t figure out who had called out to me.

“Grace,” I heard again. The voice seemed to be coming from the couch. But that would mean it was Lexi calling me. Surely, my ears were playing tricks on me.

“Grace,” she said again and laughed sweetly. “Here’s a spot.”

I looked around the room again to see if there were any other options. There wasn’t.

“I don’t bite,” she said sweetly.

I walked to the couch and sat down. “Thanks,” was all I could say.

“So,” she started, “I hear you got a boyfriend out of your …” she bit her bottom lip, “game.”

“Well…” I wished I had disappeared with Niles.

“That’s so great!” she continued. “I’m so happy for you.”

I looked around the room for any other place to sit.

“Matty,” Lexi called out causing me to jump. “I saved you a spot.”

He smiled and nodded but continued to look around the room. But she had saved the last possible sitting place. He walked over and sat on the other side of her. As soon as he did, she linked arms with him.

“I’m surprised you didn’t bring your boyfriend,” Lexi said to me.

“Mac?” I asked. “He’s working.”

“Too bad. It is hard dating someone who chooses to work on Sunday. What was it you said in your talk a few weeks ago?” she asked Matt.

“Working on Sunday is not good.” Matt mumbled and I had to fight hard not to laugh.

Lexi’s eyes narrowed. “Anyway, maybe we could double some time.”

Matt coughed loudly and tried unsuccessfully to untangle his arm from hers. Doogan walked in and was crestfallen when he saw our seating arrangement.

“Doogan!” I said causing Matt and Lexi to jump. “Why don’t you sit here?”

He shook his head but inched forward.

“No, I’ve got to find my date,” I stood up. “You might as well.” He was already to the couch. I walked to the doorway and looked back. Doogan looked happy. Lexi looked annoyed. And Matt looked uncomfortable, which I felt bad about.

I found the kitchen and also my date. Niles was talking to the bishop’s wife.

“Hi,” I said. “I wondered where you disappeared to.”

The bishop’s wife looked at me and then at Niles and smiled. “I better go see if bishop needs any help.” She said and patted my arm as she went into the other room.

I sat on a stool next to Niles. We sat in silence for a few moments.

“The weather is supposed to get warmer,” he spoke looking down at the counter.

At first, I wondered if he had seen Mac’s call out to me on the news and was making fun of me. But after studying him for a few seconds, I could tell this was just his topic of choice. “Yeah, I heard that.”

“We’re cooler than Salt Lake or Denver,” he continued.

“Yeah, I’ve noticed. Wyoming is cooler.” I would have used the word colder.

“It’s because of our altitude,” he said matter-of-factly and almost made eye contact with me.

“Is that right?” I wondered if I could get my spot back on the couch.

“We’re in the mountains, so we’ll always be cooler.”

“So,” I tried making the conversation light, “we should move some place lower?”

“Only if you like it hotter,” he looked at me. If he didn’t look so sincere, I would have started laughing.

I nodded. “Do you want to come in for the fireside?”

“I prefer to stay in here.”

I bit my lip trying to decide what proper dating etiquette called for.

“There you are,” Matt said walking into the kitchen. “We’re about ready to start.”

“Don’t you want to come in?” I asked Niles.

“Bishop wants to get started,” Lexi walked in.

“Go ahead and start, we’ll be in, ” I looked at Niles who kept his head down. “In a few minutes.”

“You coming?” Doogan popped his head in.

Niles started looking for the exits. Judging by our quiet ride here, I could tell we were three people past his comfort zone.

“You all should go in,” I felt bad for intruding on Niles’ solitude.

No one moved. Niles began fidgeting. I was as uncomfortable as Niles looked.

“Hey everyone,” the bishop said patting Doogan’s back warmly. “The fireside is in the other room.”

I looked at everyone. I went into the living room and sat on the floor in front of the tv. Lexi and Doogan sat on the couch. Matt stayed by the kitchen doorway and leaned against the wall. Niles never came in.

Everyone in the room snickered and whispered. I didn’t get much out of the fireside that night.